Friction can be a drag

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Fat pills

with 10 comments


What about these new over-the-counter diet pills? The £1-a-day pill, called Alli, has been given the green light by the European Commission for safety and effectiveness but there are concerns over side-effects and what else your body gets rid of when you shit fat.

Apparently, one of the side-effects of taking the pills is charmingly described as “anal leakage”.  Yes, the unabsorbed fat leaks from yur ass and apparently makes flatulence risky, which is not only embarrassing and uncomfortable but create stinky stains on your trouser too.

GlaxoSmithKline, who make and sell both Xenical and Alli, have done tests on the new pill’s effectiveness and they say that for every 4lb lost by dieting alone, Alli can help you shift 2lb extra.

Along with the fat you lose in your stools, you also lose fat-soluble vitamins including D and A. Of the two, vitamin D is the bigger concern. Research indicates its vital role in our health above and beyond the maintenance of strong bones by helping calcium to be absorbed. Any vitamin D we get from the few dietary sources that provide it should probably not be rejected by our body because of a pill.

Anyone tried em?


Written by tree2one

February 18, 2009 at 2:44 pm

10 Responses

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  1. dont need em myself – but I’d certainly recommend them to “Full ‘Bubba’ English”.
    Reckon if I was a lardarse I’d give them a go.
    Full English? Buerthecentaur?


    February 18, 2009 at 6:37 pm

  2. Surely it’s all a sense of proportion, no pun intended. How bad for that person is the extra weight, and how bad is the extra loss of vitamins… but a crash diet would also starve a body of those vitamins. Plus on the flatulence leakage side, there are reasonable diapers for grownups these days, or an ass tampon, surely?


    February 19, 2009 at 10:36 am

  3. I having been taking fat pills on and off for a month as well as increasing my exercise levels.

    Flatulance isnt a problem really, but when you need to evacuate your bowel, it comes on like a steam train.

    Regarding leakage, any self respecting man should have a copule of skid marks in his underwear by the end of the day.

    Shaftoe, you might as well come off your girlie diet now because it aint working. The baggy clothes dont fool anyone dude – bring back your yellow shellsuit.


    February 19, 2009 at 2:23 pm

  4. Full English – when your on these do you feel like you can just eat what you want and not worry about it? I wonder whether these pills are sponsored by McDonalds cos they seem like a good excuse for promoting unhealthy eating habits. They should give one free with a big mac or maybe just mix it into the mayo. Are you not worried about the healthy fats (omega) just passin straight through like a steam train?


    February 19, 2009 at 2:46 pm

  5. Back in the sixties the Doc would simply presribe you amphetamines…..aaaah….the sixties….


    February 19, 2009 at 5:19 pm

  6. Tree – Good point.
    In terms of priorities of worry, the fat pills come much lower down the list than all the other pills that pass through my body.


    February 19, 2009 at 5:26 pm

  7. I’m with Dontthink, a couple of wraps of charlie and you ain’t eating shit!


    February 19, 2009 at 11:49 pm

  8. The good old ‘charlie diet’ could set you back considerably more than £1 a day tho


    February 20, 2009 at 10:56 am

  9. Back in the day my aunt wanted to become an air hostess. In those days they had pretty strict guidelines on how heavy you could be…so she went to the doctor for some diet pills.

    He put her on a 30 course of amphetamines courtesy of the glorious NHS (pills to be taken twice a day until course complete).

    By the end of the course the weight had fallen off, but she was in the throes of a complete nervous break down (paranoia, insomnia, neurosis you name it). This resulted in her swapping the idea of air hospitality for a career in mental health.


    February 20, 2009 at 12:46 pm

  10. It’s a good observation Dontthink, most people in Mental health need it themselves more than their supposed patients.


    February 20, 2009 at 12:54 pm

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